Hi folks,
This is going to be a fairly personal post, so I understand if you want to give it a miss and wait for something more hobby related. Each blog post that I do is a snapshot of where I am in life, so it feels remiss not to mention what has been going on.
Mid way through July I received a phone call that my father had been taken to hospital. This wasn't necessarily unexpected; he has been in-and-out of the emergency department very frequently the past 5 years, and seriously ill for at least 10. One of my first memories as a child is getting lost in a hospital. It is fair to say we have spent a lot of time in hospital rooms talking about serious things. We have said our last goodbyes on several occasions.
This time was more serious, if that is possible. He was mostly unresponsive, though I got a squeeze from his hand the first day. I am sure he knew I was there. He passed away peacefully in his sleep a few days later.
I wonder if any father-son relationship is truly simple. Our's was complicated. I cannot imagine raising a family with the kinds of experiences and challenges he had to face. I have intentionally tried to raise my own children in a very different way. He taught me many lessons about life which I cleave to, some of which directly relate to the hobby. His love language was building aircraft models with me when I was growing up. A lot of the things I know about model construction and painting come from him. One of my fondest memories was building an AV-8B Harrier model with him, hoping to get it done in time for show-and-tell at school. Knowing that good things take time, we decided not to rush it at the end. When I woke up in the morning, though, it was painted with all the decals on; he had stayed up all night to finish it off.
I find myself "picking up the pieces" at the moment. Some pieces broke off a long time ago and some have been ground into dust after many years of wear. It is hard to know what the vessel will look like when I'm done (if that every happens). It is taking professional help and the love of an amazing family to make progress.
I'll wrap up the post with a photo of Dad as I choose to remember him. Happy and healthy, someplace by the sea, surrounded by friends and with me.
